Resolutions

With New Year’s Day just a few weeks back there’s been the inevitable talk of resolutions.  Did you make one or not?  Can you stick with it?  Is it realistic?  I haven’t made them in years as I never follow through.  I know I need to lose weight, pray more, become a better housekeeper, exercise, etc.  All those things and more are on my perpetual “to do” better list.  

I thought of something recently that changes at how I look at resolutions.  Every time we go to confession we make a one.  We say the Act of Contrition just before being absolved of our sins.  The version I learned way back when is this:

O my God, I am heartily sorry for

having offended you, and I detest

all my sins, because of Your just

punishments, but most of all because

they offend You, my God, who are

all-good and deserving of all my love.

I firmly resolve, with the help of

Your grace, to sin no more and to

avoid the near occasion of sin.

Amen

It is never too late and it is never in vain to make a resolution.  If I goof up, fall off the wagon, act like my usual, weak human self, I have the opportunityto pick myself up, dust myself off, and start all over again.

I like that.

AMDG

Sunday

The Prayer of a Servant’s Heart

Lord, guide my thoughts,

my days, my plans,

Direct my work,

my walk, my hands.

Through Your Spirit,

Lord, use my voice,

that lives be changed

and hearts rejoice.

Quick Takes (21)

-1-

Holy Cow!  We have a whole weekend with absolutely no plans.  That doesn’t happen often.  Usually the plans aren’t anything big – errands that need to be run, watering the plants at church, house projects – but they take time and attention.  I am really going to enjoy the quiet. I’d like to finish the book I’ve been reading, Toward the Gleam, as it getting really interesting.

-2-

As I take advantage of the time at home, maybe I can finally get the last of the papers filed that are sitting in my office.  As you may recall, I started sorting and purging a few weeks ago in an attempt to find my eye glass prescription.  There is still one pile of papers I have been willfully ignoring.  Where are  the paper fairies when you need them?

-3-

Speaking of that eye glass prescription, I still don’t like bifocals, even with slightly bigger lenses.  But, I suppose, I’m really going to have to suck it up and get used to them.  Not seeing clearly is not an option!

-4-

Himself may have brought flowers to brighten my day, but he has really touched a lot of other people’s days as well.  So many people have stopped by my desk to comment on how they brighten up an otherwise gloomy day.

-5-

Lent starts in just a little over three weeks.  I have been thinking about it for a couple of reasons.  Another lady and I are in charge of the church decorations.  The Lenten & Easter season is our busiest time of year.  For Lent, flowers and plants go away and purple draping comes out.  The starkness and barrenness of the church reminds us that it is a time of preparation and mourning. 

-6-

Back to Lent.  I know what I have to do in church, but I am still working on what I want to do personally.  I find it so easy to do something that I know will be good for me and help my health/waistline, but might not help me spiritually.  Any ideas?  I’m assuming we’ll be doing Prayer Buddies again.

-7-

“One of the chief uses of religion is that it makes us remember our coming from darkness, the simple fact that we are created.”

– GKC, The Boston Sunday Post, 1/16/21 

Don't forget to check out more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.

Have a great weekend!

AMDG

Thankful Thursday (9)

Today I am thankful for. . .

* Himself.  The other day I was having a really, really crabby start to the day, which included me stomping around the kitchen and out of the house.   When I called home later that morning, Himself answered with the most cheery “Good morning, Sunshine!”  I burst out laughing and my day brightened considerably.  After that, how could I possibly be crabby?

* Lunch.  We had a lunch date today.  Himself picked me  up at work and we headed out to a local burger joint.  And, he surprised me with these which are now sitting on my desk:

* Burgers.  As I mentioned above, we went to a local burger joint for lunch.  It’s a spot opened by Food Network’s Iron Chef from 2007 and boy is it good.  The burgers were dripping, juicy yumminess and were so big we could only finish half.  I know what I’m eating for dinner tonight!

* Faith and Prayers.  When Himself was getting the flowers above, he got to chatting with the lady who was ringing out his order.  Her brother is going to be having a bone marrow transplant and she asked for prayers.  Isn’t it great to be able to talk with strangers about our faith in God?!

Check out more things to be thankful for over at The Road Home.

I am who I am

A number of years ago Himself and I went  away for a long weekend.   We stayed at a historic hotel on the river and took in many of the local attractions.  There is a college nearby and we learned that the spring semester’s play would be performed while we were in town and tickets were still available.    The play, "Art" by Yasmina Reza, is about three men and what the purchase of a very expensive abstract painting does to their friendship.

Partway through the play, an exasperated Yvan declares:

"If I am who I am because I am who I am and you are who you are because you are who you are then I am who I am and you are who you are, but if I am who I am because you are who you are and you are who you are because I am who I am then I am not who I am and you are not who you are."

He seems to be saying that we can’t be ourselves if we are influenced by another.  My answer to that is Hogwash!

We are constantly influenced by others, starting from the moment of our birth.  Our parents teach us, try to impart their values upon us, protect us, guide us.  Then we head off to school and our teachers and friends now have an impact on our lives.  The same happens when we go off to work, get married, etc.  The influence of others isnot, in and of itself, a bad thing or a good thing.  It’s what we do with it that determines its value.

A priest friend of ours, in a homily, once told the story of two brothers.  Not much different in age, they were brought up by a father who was highly involved in crime.  Eventually  this man ended up in prison and out of the two boys’ lives.  One son grew to be an intelligent,  articulate young man that went on to medical school.  The other son took another path, following in the footsteps of his father.  When both sons were asked why they made they choices they did, they responded the same:  “What choice was there with a father like mine?”

What got me thinking of all this is Miranda Lambert’s song The House That Built Me.  I was listening to it on the way home from work one day and it got me thinking about who I am.  What built me?

I know they say you can't go home again

I just had to come back one last time

Ma'am, I know you don't know me from Adam

But these hand prints on the front steps are mine

Up those stairs in that little back bedroom

Is where I did my homework and I learned to play guitar

And I bet you didn't know under that live oak

My favorite dog is buried in the yard

Ref:

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it

This brokenness inside me might start healing

Out here it's like I'm someone else

I thought that maybe I could find myself

If I could just come in, I swear I'll leave

Won't take nothing but a memory

From the house that built me

Mama cut out pictures of houses for years

From "Better Homes and Garden" magazine

Plans were drawn and concrete poured

And nail by nail and board by board

Daddy gave life to mama's dream

Ref.

You leave home, you move on

And you do the best you can

I got lost in this whole world

And forgot who I am

Ref.

What built me?  Answering that question is much harder than I had anticipated. 

Some things are obvious.  I am truly my parents’ daughter, both in good ways and bad.  I think I have my mother’s sense of hospitality and also her creativity.  I have my father’s technical skills and his appreciation for hard work and doing things right.  But, I also hold onto grudges for far too long. 

From my husband I have learned to look at the big picture, not to rush to judgment and paint everyone with the same big, bold strokes.  I’ve also learned to slow down and enjoy the view. 

My sister has been an example of loyalty.  When we were growing up, we used to have some wing-doozie fights.  Nothing was off limits.  But, if someone else messed with the other, watch out!  We were right there together.  Today, she is my best friend and confidant. 

I have a friend, who many years ago, would tell me that I think too much.   It wasn’t a criticism, it was more of an observation.  I would over-analyze things.  Some things just “are”, or as I often say now “It is what it is.”  Sometimes that is a hard lesson to learn.

These are just some of the people that “built” me.  There’s so much more – events, circumstances, places, Faith.  Thankfully, I’m a work in progress.  There’s still time to get it right.

AMDG

Hope SPRINGs Eternal

Himself reminded me this weekend that Spring is now less than eight weeks away.  Only eight weeks!  I can manage winter for that much more, I think.  Maybe.  Hopefully.  Not that there’s much choice in the matter.

One of the great indicators that Spring is coming, that it is going to get warmer, is the arrival of gardening catalogs.  They are such a welcome reminder that winter won’t last forever.  The problem is, when I look at these catalogs, I want one of everything!  But, alas, I have neither the space nor the wallet for that.

The two definite additions to this year’s garden are going to be dahlias.  More specifically, these two:

In the Fall I cleared out an area that had become overgrown with a not very pretty plant I put in years ago.  I think these will look much better.  Come on Spring!

AMDG

Infertility vs. Pro-Life

Note: I wrote this several weeks ago and have been debating with myself on posting it or not.  The quote below is used  without permission, and, if M requests, I will remove it.

A friend, whom I have known for quite a long time, has published several nonfiction books and is now aspiring to become a published author of fiction.  Since I love to read, fiction mostly, I have been reading his drafts and giving him feedback.

On the latest novella I have yet to respond.  The writing is sharp, the story is thought provoking, and, in M's style of writing, contains much witty dialog.  But I am having a difficult time putting into words to him what I think of the book.

There’s one section that pained me.  I’ve long known that our politics and general life philosophies tend to be at opposite ends of the spectrum.  But his professed atheism and my devout Catholicism has never impeded our friendship.  I doubt this writing of his will change our friendship either.

One day in 1973, Gabriel completely shocked me with a question out of the blue.

“What is abortion?” he asked.

I was taken aback, but tried to hide my surprise at the fact that an 11-year-old

would even know the word. “It’s a little complicated, Gabriel. Why do you ask?”

“At school today, Mrs. McCovey was really upset. We asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn’t tell us. At first. But we kept asking, and finally she got really mad and said that the government was going to allow babies to be killed. Is that true? Will the government actually kill babies.”

I have to tell you, that one is a “little talk” that no one thinks to prepare for. Idon’t remember exactly what I told him. I know I reassured him that, no, the government would do no such thing. I seem to recall covering the “usual” talking points as best as I could: a woman’s right to choose, the embryo stage, viability outside of the womb. I felt as though I did a horrible job. But I must have done OK, since he said, “All right. As long as the government isn’t killing any babies,” before walking down the street to a friend’shouse.

I later learned that Gabriel’s teacher had what we would call “reproductive issues.” Had it been 2003, she could have gone to a fertility specialist and been given a chance to realize her dream of motherhood. But that was 1973, and test tube babies were still the stuff of science fiction.

So I surmised that she simply was venting her frustration, and expressing her view that someone should not be “throwing away” a baby, a baby that she would be grateful to have. I sympathized with her. I felt sorry for her. But at the same time, I didn’t feel that it was right for her to pass that view along to impressionable elementary school students, especially in so demonstrative a fashion.

I guess more than questioning him, it’s a question for all pro-choicers.  Do you really, truly think I am pro-life only because I am infertile?  That I think abortion is wrong only because it limits the number of infants available for adoption? 

That is not who I am.  Perhaps I am more sensitive to the "choice" that woman is making.  Does she really, truly realize what she is choosing?  Perhaps I am a little louder in voicing my stance as I know just what a precious gift that life is.  Perhaps I am a little more active in the pro-life movement since I have more time, time that is not given to the raising and nurturing of those little choices.

I hope and pray some publisher is smart enough grab M's work and run with it.  It's important and intelligent and thought provoking.

I got me thinking.

Quick Takes (20)

- 1-

PMS really stinks.  Not the word I really wanted to use, but I’m trying to be polite. I hate feeling crabby and cranky and tired.  I don’t like not sleeping.  At my age you would think I’d be over this by now.  When will it ever end???

-2-

Back in the 80s I remember watching a movie in which a real life ballerina played an ice skater.  It was the most beautiful skating I ever remember seeing.  Does anyone else remember that movie?  I’m trying to find out the name of it.

-3-

I have been getting frustrated with Blogger.  Every time I try to leave a comment, the combox screen just freezes up.  I’m not ignoring any of you, I just can’t let you know I’m thinking of you. (And I am.)

-4-

I’ve really been enjoying writing lately.  That’s actually kind of funny because in high school and college I rather hated it.  I suppose this time it’s different because I am writing about things that I want to not what I’ve been told to.

-5-

I have started researching the raising of goats.  I really wasn’t kidding when I said I want to get some, eventually.  They are an interesting critter and it should be a fun process.  It’s going to take a bit of time getting ready for them.  We need to reclaim an area that is overgrown with weeds and get grass growing there instead, build a barn and put in a fence.  I’m actually looking forward to the barn building.  A couple years ago I built a bridge with my dad and have been wanting a new construction project.

-6-

The cold weather and dark evenings are really conducive to curling up under a blanket with a good book so I have been reading a lot lately.  If you’re looking for one, I have just the suggestion.  I’m currently reading Toward the Gleam by T. M. Doran, and although I haven’t gotten very far, I’m finding it to be a great read.  It combines adventure, mystery and history with very intelligent writing.

- 7 -



“If there were no God, there would be no atheists.”

–  GKC Where All Roads Lead, 1922 

Don't forget to check out more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.

Have a great weekend!

Thankful Thursday (8)

Today I am thankful for. . .

* On-call repairmen, warm blankets, space heaters and fireplaces.  All of these helped get us through this weekend’s furnace outage in relative comfort.

* Lucy.  She’s the neighbor’s dog and is full of energy and personality.  She entertains Jack and amuses us.  We had a blast playing with the two dogs in the snow on Saturday.  Such silly fun!

* Snow plow drivers.  Our little township does a great job at keeping the roads clean and safe. 

AMDG

Wednesday Weigh In

Well, all day I've been trying to figure out how I can sugar coat this. It was not a good week for the scale. I'd like to leave it at that, but I suppose if I'm going to reflect on things that I did that worked I should probably do the opposite.

* I cheated on my 30 day challenge and stopped at Chic-Fil-A Monday morning and got fast food breakfast. Reset the 30 day challenge!

* I ate pizza. Too much pizza. Why order one when they can deliver two just as easily? Well, Donna, because you'll eat more of it. Duh!

* I haven't been packing lunches as much as I should. It's kind of like breakfast; packing will save both calories and cash. I can't be so lazy and so last minute in the mornings.

* PMS. 'Nuf said.


AMDG

A great day of a different kind

By all accounts, this weekend could probably be considered a bust.  But I think it’s just the opposite – good, just in a different sort of way.

The middle of last week we had unseasonably warm weather in our area with highs in the 40s and 50s.  On Friday, however, the bottom fell out and the temperature dropped into the teens, the winds blew ferociously and the snow piled up.

That morning our furnace started making funny noises so I stayed home from work to call the repair service.  Since it was still working, we set the appointment for Tuesday afternoon.

Apparently, it was worse than we had anticipated.  When Jack and I returned from our Sunday morning walk in the sunny, but frigid, 14 degrees, the furnace was sounding worse than ever.  In a horrible, loud, screeching way, it died.

We waited for the repairman to make an early, albeit unscheduled, visit.  And as we figured, the motor seized up and needed to be replaced.  Ah, the joys of home ownership!  Since motors aren’t something they normally stock in their truck, the repair had to wait until today.  Until then, no heat.

The house stayed pretty tolerable throughout most of the day, but as the sun went down, so did the temp inside.   We put up a blanket between the kitchen and living room and lit a fire.  I curled up under a blanket, sipped some hot tea, and finished the latest James Patterson book as Himself read his latest download on the Kindle nearby.  It was a relaxing, cozy, peaceful sort of Sunday.

Just what I needed.

I’ve been feeling a bit stressed out always leaving home to go to work, go to church, go to one store or another or run some errand.  I’ve been craving a day where I didn’t need to get into the car and go someplace.  So, when the furnace died, I got my second home day of an unexpected long weekend.

Wasn’t that great?!

AMDG

It was Snow much fun!

Friday evening Jack started barking at what I thought was nothing.  A few minutes later I saw what had gotten his attention - his best budy, Lucy, playing with her boys next door.  Jack cried and whined to be let out but it was not to be.  But yesterday?  That's another story.  When we saw Lucy outside we let Jack out and great fun was had by all!

Journey of a thousand words

We have a friend, Fr. Ed, who is scary brilliant.  There are those people who know a little about a lot.  He's not like that.  And there are the ones that know a lot about a little.  That's not him either.  He knows a lot about a lot.  If something is worth learning, it is worth learning well and in depth.

I first encountered Fr. Ed at the parish where Himself and I eventually met.  He was an Associate Pastor there and was very involved with the youth programs. 

He used to give these sermons that, to me at the time, seemed to last forever.  I had a hard time following them and at some point would tune out.  That was at a time when going to Mass was just an obligation that I wanted to get over as quickly as possible.

Once I started learning more about our faith I really began to appreciate what he had to say.  He sometimes takes a circuitous path, but if you really listen and follow along, it all makes so much sense.  The journey of words is wild, winding, bold and beautiful. 

Since neither he nor we are at that parish any longer we aren’t privy to his weekly sermons.  But we get something better.  Fr. Ed has grown into a dear friend who visits often for dinner and a chat. 

It’s been a while.  I think I need to make a phone call.

AMDG

Thankful Thursday (7)

Today I am thankful for. . .

My prayer buddy – This Advent I was remembered in prayer by a non-blogger, Deana. She wrote me the most amazing, beautiful letter telling me, in spite of the intentions I had listed, she felt called to pray for me.  This was a difficult Advent season for me and I am sure that her prayers were one of the reasons I made it through.  I am excited, also, about the gift she sent - a Mass is being said for us on February 9th!  Awesome!

Coffee – I received a Kuerig from my dad and it allows me to indulge each morning in a cup of fresh brewed, caffeinated goodness.  It makes me happy.  I’m not joking.  There is something in coffee that seems to improve my mood.  My morning walks, my drive in to work, making breakfast, all seem much more enjoyable.   

AMDG

Wednesday Weigh In

-1

In a comment last week, All in His Perfect Timing suggested writing about what diet or lifestyle changes I made that helped during the past month.  That is a great idea.  As forgetful as I can be at times, though, I think I’m going to do that on a weekly basis.  It will be a good reminder to myself on what did or didn’t work.

åMy friend Tracy sends e-mails, usually twice a day, to remind all her friends to drink their water.  Instead of drinking so much tea and coffee, I’ve been trying to drink at least one bottle of water each in the morning and the afternoon.

ä As part of my 30 day challenge to myself, I’m avoiding fast food breakfasts.  No more quick, or not so quick, trips through Mickey D’s, BK’s, or Dunkin’ D’s drive-thrus.  I think I’m saving both calories and cash.

More Music. . . It was about Him

Yesterday “brown Santa”, the UPS man, delivered a long awaited package.  Among other things that I had ordered was Collin Raye’s latest CD, His Love Remains.   I brought it to work this morning and listened to it for the first time while reviewing some documents.  It is beautiful collection of old, standard Catholic hymns, newer Christian music, and a few of Collin’s originals.

As I listened, some of the songs brought me back to different times in my life when they figured prominently.

The first time I heard How Beautiful was at the wedding of our friends, K & S.  Knowing their devotion to the Eucharist and love for each other, I am reminded of them every time I hear this song.  They are a beautiful example of a God centered marriage.

Not long after Himself and I started dating I attended the Christ Renews His Parish weekend at our church.  I initially thought it was a one weekend commitment, but little did I know I was being pulled in for a long, long time.  The following year the women I attended the program with that weekend were to put on the Renewal for the next group.  We chose as our theme Here I Am, Lord.  That weekend occurred just one week prior to our wedding.  What a great way to prepare for our upcoming sacrament.

Three other songs on this CD bring me right back to my mom’s funeral.  Mom had been part of the Altar and Rosary group at church.  As we walked in to Amazing Grace the women from A&R lined the aisle holding lit candles, the same ones  traditionally lit at the Easter Vigil Mass to bring the church out of darkness and into light.  At offertory the organist sang a solo rendition of Ave Maria and I remember my sister, dad and I sobbing.  It was so beautiful, so perfect.

The song I listened to today, that got me started writing this post, was the song at communion, How Great Thou Art.  When we arrived at church, Fr. Mike met us in the back and asked me if anyone in our family was a Eucharistic Minister that could help out with communion.  Not only am I one, I was commissioned right there in that church.   

It was during that communion that I gained a sense of peace, both with mom’s death and how it fit in with our faith.  It was the first time as an EM that I truly got what I was doing.  That this is Jesus.  I knew it before, but I didn’t know it, not fully, not completely. 

Someone asked me afterwards, how I was able to distribute communion without breaking down.  But at that very point in time, it wasn’t about me.  It was about Him.

Life’s a Musical

Have you ever watched those old movies with Fred Astair and Ginger Rogers,  Bob Hope, Bing Crosby?  Or how about Elvis Presley, Annette Funicello and Frankie Avalon?  In the middle of a scene, they’ll just break out in song and dance.  I used to laugh at those.  When did that ever happen?

Well, how about now, in my life currently?  Minus the dancing of course.  (most of the time)

Many times, on the way home from church, we’ll have the final hymn running through our heads.  We start out humming it and that turns into a joyful noise on the rest of the drive.  I asked our organist and music director if he plays catchy songs on purpose for the dismissal, and he just chuckled.  I think he’s up to something!

Other times, we will be doing something, anything, and it’ll remind of us of a song.  So we start singing, Himself in much better voice than I.  Be warned, the words are never what the songwriter intended. 

This is one that usually comes up when we take a trip down to Amish country. 

Get your horsey hitched up

Head out on the bi-ways

Looking for the pasture

And all those piles of hay

Born to be Mild!

This one I belt out, badly, generally for no reason at all.

God Bless Armenia

Land I don’t know

Never been there, Won’t go there

On a plane or a bus or a boat

Hey, I’ve told you I’m easily amused!

AMDG

Monday Morning Moaning

Why is it that during the week, when the alarm is set, I could sleep
forever? Or at least quite a bit later than the 6:20am it's set for.
Then we get to the weekend and I am up at 4:30 one day and 5am the
next. Seems so unfair!

What is it with drivers these days? People get into their cars and
act like they are the only ones out on the road. They travel in their
own little worlds, ignoring basic rules and common courtesies. When I
see that I am surprised that there aren't more accidents and road rage
incidents.

Anything annoying you lately?

AMDG

Paper, Paper everywhere!

Okay, back to papers.  I could keep a nice, tidy house if it wasn’t for all the papers that seem to invade and pile up around here on a regular basis. 

It really annoys me.  Someone – a store,  bank, charity, politician, business, magazine – decides they need to send me something, most usually trying to get their hands on my wallet.  That’s easy to say no to.  But what I can’t say no to is the time it takes to deal with it all.

One month we saved all the credit applications we received.  Between the two of us we were getting, on average, ten to twelve a week.  A week!  And it’s not like you can just toss those out.  They really should be shredded.

Don’t get me started on catalogs.  You buy one thing, once, from one and you’re on their list forever.  And on the list of whoever they decide to sell your name to.  There is one we get, Home Decorators, that I will never buy another thing from.  I’ve called no less than half a dozen times to be removed from their distribution list.  Three years later, those darn catalogs are still coming. 

Then there are the charities.  I never knew there were so many orders of nuns, priests and monks.  Health and human service organizations abound as well.  At least when many of the charities come looking for your money, they send you a little “gift”.  At the rate we get these solicitations, I’ll never need to buy another return address label, prayer card or rosary as long as I live.

Add to all of that the credit card, utility, bank and mortgage statements that you legitimately get and you’ll have one large pile of paperwork.    I’m finding it pretty easy to lose something important in the midst of all the junk mail.

I can’t bring myself to do much of the on-line bill paying that’s out there for my convenience, ;-) , but I have found a few ways of shrinking Mount Paperwork.   When we first moved into this house, we were getting four “free” local newspapers, most of which went unread.    I called and had those stopped.  Sorry, Fr. Joe, I don’t have any more bags for the green recycling bin for the school fundraiser.

There’s also a phone number to get unsolicited credit applications stopped.  Just doing that has made a big difference in our weekly mail delivery.  Check these out:

To opt out for five years: Call toll-free 1-888-5-OPT-OUT (1-888-567-8688) or visit www.optoutprescreen.com. The phone number and website are operated by the major consumer reporting companies.

To opt out permanently: You may begin the permanent Opt-Out process online at www.optoutprescreeen.com. To complete your request, you must return the signed Permanent Opt-Out Election form, which will be provided after you initiate your online request.

To get off of mailing lists:

The Direct Marketing Association's (DMA) Mail Preference Service (MPS) lets you opt out of receiving unsolicited commercial mail from many national companies for five years. When you register with this service, your name will be put on a "delete" file and made available to direct-mail marketers and organizations. This will reduce most of your unsolicited mail. However, your registration will not stop mailings from organizations that do not use the DMA's Mail Preference Service. To register with DMA's Mail Preference Service, go to www.dmachoice.org (it’s free on the website), or mail your request with a $1 processing fee to:

DMAchoice
Direct Marketing Association
P.O. Box 643
Carmel, NY 10512

I’m still plowing through all sorts of paper we have lying around and stored in those bottomless wicker baskets, but at least the inward flow is slowing down. 

Now,  if someone wants to send me a big check, that’s another story.  That’s paperwork I like!

AMDG