Eighteen years ago I said I do. I am not certain I grasped the full extent of that little phrase. All I knew was that I was marrying the love of my life. How little that love then is compared to what it is now!
We are frequently amazed that it has been, in fact, eighteen years. It seems like yesterday and it seems like forever. I don’t remember what life was like before him. It’s as if he has always been a part of my life.
I love how we can know what the other is thinking with just a look, no words needed. But when we do use our words, we have our own jokes, our own “isms”, our own sayings. Things that make us “us”.
We often say that we have both endearing qualities and enduring ones. The endearing ones are the those traits that are sweet and kind and good. They are the ones that probably attracted us to the other in the first place. But, when one of us does some lame or annoying, we often joke “that’s just one of your enduring qualities.” It’s just something that we just put up with, probably not one of our best moments.
Although it wasn’t one of the readings at our nuptial mass, I reread one of the more popular wedding readings, 1 Corinthians 13, today.
Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth.
It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
In a sermon, our pastor once suggested replacing the word “Love” with our own names. I tried it and found that as I go through all those qualities that love is supposed to be, my tone changes. They start out as statements but quickly turn to questions. Am I patient, or kind? Do I rejoice in the truth?
Those are the qualities I see in Himself and the ones I hope he sees in me. They are ones the are durable and lasting. And, hopefully we'll have eighteen or twenty-eight or a whole lot more years together to work on our enduring qualities!